24 items of Exostock for use in All Marts

Hi. I have been running a campaign of Raiders of the Lost Mart for the past few months. The current quarantine/Covid-19 crisis has effectively ended the campaign so I thought I'd post 24 items of Exostock encountered in our game for inspiration and use by other GMs. The All Mart that the PCs worked at carried all the sorts of things that a Best Buy and a Costco might if said items were what were left over from the stock that those big box stores failed to sell, months after the fact, they also sold boats, and used Saturn cars.

Exostock Catalog:

  1. Animated Lawn Chair Moth Thing: Transforms into mechanical clockwork moth monster.
  2. Broken Mirror: Doesn’t reflect the wielder, but lets the wielder see invisible creatures behind them.
  3. Crescent Moon screw driver: The screw driver can adjust minds.
  4. Calva's Chili Dedos: Individually wrapped meat sticks that deals remote significant blast damage equal to a Secrecy roll to anyone that the holder imagines dead. The damage manifests as a burst stomach. Its possible to recharge a Dedo by feeding it to a living human being, which kills them, and has to be dug out of their stomach to be reused.
  5. Dancing Cossack Doll: makes the wielder invisible.
  6. Double E batteries: If you put one Double E battery in your mouth, you become neutrally buoyant for 1-10 minutes effectively weighing nothing.
  7. Elsinore Beer: Has a picture of Saint Elsinore on the Canadian style can. Elsinore Beer heals wounds, and can even bring back the recently deceased. However, they always come back wrong.
  8. Fanal Flashlight: Acts as a beacon to the unnatural entities known as Tenebrae, its light can shine into other dimensions including the astral plane.
  9. Green Grail Soda: bestows the Nose for Magic supernatural identity between 1-100%.
  10. Hotchkiss Revolving Shotgun: When fired, the clockwork internal mechanisms of the Hotchkiss allows the shooter to roll their Struggle as if they had a Use Firearms Attack feature; normally without such a feature untrained shooters can only fire wildly. However whenever the Hotchkiss is fired, the shooter rolls one die which is read as a matched success or failure. Rolling a ten on this die counts as a fumble. The shotgun has five charges*
  11. Infinite Pill Bottle: Apparently an empty brown glass bottle labeled as a prescription of Ephemerol, for one Dirk Allen. The bottle has the power to duplicate any discrete single object that can fit down the bottle's neck, until the duplicates fill the interior of the bottle however doing so makes those in close proximity physically ill. The first item inserted into the bottle uses up its mojo.
  12. Iphwinn Eyeliner: The next illusion or mind affecting magick targeted against someone wearing the eyeliner automatically fails.
  13. Jiffy Shine Vacuum Cleaner: A nuclear powered cleaning automaton that resembles the mechanical offspring of a proton pack and a spider that can suck up both physical debris as well as minor magical charges, bad dreams, astral parasites, and ghosts as well as hardened and failed notches. It is self propelled and can effectively be commanded to clean /attack by whomever turns it on. It has one use/charge which lasts about 1 minute.
  14. Loop Hammer: Mystically bonds the wielder with any predominantly wooden structure that the hammer is used to construct, so that the health of the structure reflects that of the bonded person and the bonded person cannot die as long as the structure still stands.
  15. Mandelbrot Pear: Grants aura sight at between 1-50%
  16. Red Jenny’s Baking Powder: possibly lets you touch intangible entities.
  17. Pickle Seeds: No, not cucumber seeds. A packet of seeds that grow pickles. They also grow at an accelerated rate and spread rapidly to other nearby plots of land.
  18. Plato Flakes Cereal: guarantees that you will eat Plato Flakes 24 hours in the future.
  19. Saturn model Astra L super compact car: can drive into the Astral plane.
  20. Triangular pocket watch: Attunes to its owner so that their heart beats in sync with the watch, stopping the watch puts them into stasis, and setting the time forward can send the owner up to 12 hours into the future but destroys the pocket watch.
  21. Wally Goes to the Moon 2 space hopper: teleports to the moon
  22. Viscous Combustion Fuel: refuels/powers the Saturn Astra L, or any other item of exostock covered by the fuel.
  23. ZOGS potato based snacks: Eating a bag makes the consumer invulnerable to physical harm as long as they have one of the kimchi flavored potato chips in their mouth.
  24. Wise Witch, LLC. Hermetic Brownie Bin: Any organic item stored in the bin is perfectly preserved and people carrying minor or significant charges can store them in the bin as well.
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